Unwritten Rules of Relationships

In show 003 we talk about how some people want to be married just for the sake of being married. Sounds crazy doesn’t it? We know; that’s exactly why we had to talk about it.

Take a listen and leave us your comments on this show topic.

We love hearing from our audience.

The other night I was flipping through the stations and watched a couple of minutes of the “I Love Ray J” show.  This show is crazy,  but there was something interesting happening.  Ray J is down to his three final women and he wanted some of his friends/”homies” , along with Snoop Dogg, to come by his house to check out the girls and give him their thoughts.  Well one his homies  revealed, one of the girls had slept with another one of the homies.  Now they started to clown this girl and made sure to let Ray J know she was too much of a ho.  Now these guys seemed like they wouldn’t mind a loose/ fast girl,  but they did.  They all felt like she had crossed the line and wasn’t right for Ray J because she was basically too much of a ho.  That had me thinking about the fact that no matter how much men tell women to be sexy and really want to play around  with the sexy fast girl.  There is no way they really want that woman to be their lady.

I think so many women nowadays feel more open than ever about their sexuality.  Many young women feel that sleeping around is the big deal.   However, I think many women are really misguided in this area.  Many men will play and have sex with a ho but a man is going to be in love with a real woman.  Does that mean that real women aren’t sexy? Of course not, sex appeal is not necessarily the clothes a women wears.  Most of the time its the way  she carries herself that men will find sexy in a much more lasting way.    Its true that men will flock around fast woman in tight clothes.  Those women will  enjoy a lot of artificial attention and pseudo love.   This type of attention is for the pleasure of sex not for a relationship/wife.  No man EVER wants other men to know that his wife is , was or has ever been considered a ho.  Why is that?  because no man wants to bring children in this world from a ho.   Believe it or not ladies, men want a good woman. Men want a woman they can call theirs, not someone everyone has had their hands on.  No man ever wants to meet a man and have him say ” Your wife is great in bed”.

The truth is that men don’t look at sex the same way for a women period.  Ladies,  if many men love to play with you in bed but not stay with you in a relationship.

1. You find yourself holding her purse.

2. She tells you what to wear.

3. She buys clothes that aren’t your style & you wear them to make her happy.

4. You lie to your boys to hang out with her instead.

5. You get a pedicure, manicure, or your eyebrows waxed.

6. You go to the store to buy tampons.

7. She talks sh!t about your family & you let her.

8. She made you watch “The Notebook”.

9. You have to tell her everywhere you go.

10. She makes you turn off sports & watch reality T.V.

Adapted from – http://www.time2man-up.com/?p=147

In show 002 we’re talking about open marriages; oh, and swingers too. Many participate in open marriages and feel it’s natural and healthy for their relationship. We’ll talk about it all in this episode.

Check out the show and leave us comments. We love to hear from our audience.

If we are to believe the movies, the ruthless tough guy always gets the girl. And didn’t it seem that the bad boys at school always had the hottest babes? The best looking girls always seem to love the bad guys. Maybe because the best looking guys always became the bad guys? Everywhere we tend to see bad guys and nice girls. We see fools and meatheads with the girls of our fantasies. In the mall we see our flaxen haired goddesses with America’s Most Wanted. Is it nature at work, is it us, what has gone awry?

Men are confused. We like to refer to stereotypes and work from them. Men are told that we need to be a hero and a tough guy. But then we are told we need to be in touch with our sensitive sides. Meanwhile the man down the street who treats his girlfriends like crap, never calls, is rude and disrespect appears to have a fan club developing. Life, my friends, can seem unfair. But let’s look at what is going on with this scenario.

Interest. Bad guys are interesting, they do interesting things. They have strayed from the straight-and-narrow and have developed their own code of conduct. They do what they want. They go where they want. They answer to no one. They are, in other words, fascinating. Tow the line, do as you are told and inevitably you will be become dull. Mavericks are interesting, straight guys are not.

Bad guys are confident and self assured. They know what they’re about and don’t really care what others think. They are their own men and don’t need others to prop them up. Bad guys don’t have to be in shape, just look at James Galdofini from The Sopranos, who is immensely attractive despite his rotund appearance. Some can become almost caricaturesof themselves, but that doesn’t make them any less attractive.

Plus bad guys are a challenge. We all love a challenge, and women may love a challenge even more than the boys. If something is a challenge, the end results must surely be worthwhile, right? The girls who go after bad guys want to find the pot of gold at the end of crazy rainbow. They will go to great lengths to solve their mysteries. And once they have them, once they’ve conquered the challenge, they don’t want to let go. Plus it makes for an exciting rollercoaster ride because the bad guy could walk away at any moment. The greater the danger of loosing a bad guy, the greater the effort they’ll put forth to keep them. And there may be a lesson there.

What do we have if we combine these facets? Power, strength of character, confidence, a maverick nature and an immensely interesting personality equals sexiness. That is exactly what the bad boy is, so it’s no surprise that this type of guy often get the gal. It doesn’t mean to say that we like them, and it doesn’t mean it is fair or even a good thing, but raw attraction can be nature’s way.

I am not in any way suggesting that we should all be Mr. Bad Guy. Not at all. What I am saying is that there are lessons to be learned here. What is attractive can be modified and added to our arsenal of dating weaponry. How you perceive yourself that matters the most. If you can increase your confidence levels, get your career on the right tracks, excel in what you do and be your own man within the confines of your working life, then you’ll get that bad boy confidence. And that attitude will boost your attractiveness. You don’t need to go around being bad, but you can be a bit more deliberate in your actions, a little less available and a little more enigmatic. This will boost your interest factor and again help in your attractiveness.

The modern dating game is highly complex and courting rituals can be a minefield. Go back to basics, analyze what is it that you think potential partners would like and think about how can you match of yourself to those qualities. Changing just a few small things could make the world of difference.

courtesy of TopDatingTips.com

I know by know that everybody has jumped in on the Tiger Woods drama.   I’m not here to bash Tiger actually quite the opposite.  First and foremost, unless you know Tiger and his family personally, you really don’t know what is going on.    I don’t care what the media reports.   Most of us know that a marriage is hardly ever black and white.  Most of the time, many of them exist in the gray area.

I have heard many women say Tiger should never have cheated.  I think he should have never gotten married in the first place!  First, we are talking about TIGER WOODS not Bob from accounting or Mike from the block.  I think its safe to say that he lives in a different world than most of us will ever know.  A world where just about anything he wants he can have and the temptation level is high 24 hours a day.  So when your in a position like that you have to understand who you are before you get married or in a relationship.  Forget about Tiger, many men and women are in relationships for reasons other than true commitment.  Many of us  set up  “self made disguises” to hide who we really are to be in a situation we think is right.

That’s where the problem starts.  You may want to be with someone who you know is a great person and would make a great companion. However,  in your heart, you are not at a place where you can be what THEY want.  So you disguise yourself to become what they want so you can be with a person.   For example, you are the party girl who has never found the right kind of man.  A man comes along, who doesn’t party, but is everything you want in a man.  However, you still like the party life.  So what do you do? You put on your disguise to make it work because you know he is a “good” man.  Now you have a conflict set up inside yourself because you not being yourself.  You are becoming  what you think you “should” be.   Now you have started to lie to yourself.  You will never be successful lying to yourself!

Everyday men and women  find people to be with in there lives and make this mistake. A woman who starts to become what she “thinks” is the type of woman her man wants.  Not who she really is.  A man who doesn’t really want to marry his girlfriend but does out of an obligation he feels  because they have been dating for years.   The truth is that a relationship/marriage is like a truth serum.  No matter how hard you try,  you can never hide from yourself!  You can only have a good relationship/marriage by being yourself and telling the truth.  What happens when people live a lie? People will do things to cope with the lie such as cheating , drinking , smoking, drugs, etc, etc, etc.   Why? Because a Tiger can never change his stripes and you can’t be any other person  other than the person you are!

Have you heard that song by Melanie Fiona, “It Kills Me”? I LOVE that song, but as I listened to the lyrics of this song; I quickly realized this should not be any woman’s theme song (no offense Melanie).  Like I said, I love this song; Melanie has a great voice – I mean the sista can blow, the track is hot and the harmonies are solid. However, don’t be so quick to make it your theme song for 2010. Have you checked the lyrics??

Let me recap:

1st Verse:

Oh yaahh ive got trouble with my friends
Trouble in my life
Problems when you don’t come home at night
But when you do you always start a fight
But I cant be alone , I need you to come on home
I know you messin around, but who the hell else is gonna hold me down

—Ok, from the jump this isn’t sounding too good. Problem #1 – your man isn’t coming home. Problem #2 – you know he’s messing around, but this is the type of cat you want holding you down; CA-RAY-ZEEEEEE!!!

2nd Verse:

Should I grab his cell, call this chick up
Start some shhhh then hang up
Or I should I be a lady
Oohh maybe cuz I wanna have his babies
Ohh yah yahh cuz I don’t wanna be alone
I dont need to be on my own
But I love this man
But some things I cant stand ohhhh

—Huh, sounds like things are not improving. Let’s see, can you point out the craziest part of this verse? Oh, you caught that too? Yes, he’s a liar and a cheat and YET, you want to have his babies. What kind of new fangled shit is this?!?!?!?!?

Some women have a tendency to hang on to relationships that mean them no good simply because they don’t want to be alone. But, being alone is sometimes necessary; to clear your head, get rid of excess baggage and rediscover who you really are.  Doing this will better equip you for the next relatonship. No man wants a jacked up insecure woman.

You know how y’all are so quick to make a song your theme song for the year, but ladies, this one clearly isn’t it!

Now that we got that out the way, enjoy the video, but remember, if your relationship kills you; you need to kill it!

Divorce is hard and is certainly a turning point in one’s life. The great thing is, you can gather with some friends, celebrate new beginnings and have some cake. Check out these divorce cakes….

We are so proud to debut The Truth Uncut. From the start we wanted to do a show and now it’s finally here. We hope you all send us comments because we want to continue to improve the show and make it as engaging as possible and we need your suggestions, critiques, comments, etc.

In this episode we talk about being alone by choice in order to really get yourself together so you can stop dragging around excess baggage. The excess baggage we normally carry from relationship to relationship. If you take time to be alone, work out your issues and take out the trash; you’ll set yourself up for a healthy relationship.

Check out the show and leave us your comments.

I recently saw the movie “The Ugly Truth” which was very funny, but it did point out a very true fact.  The ugly truth is that men are shallow and do want a beautiful woman!  Does she have to be smart, funny, have a good family , morals , etc, etc, etc ?  Yeah, sure, but at the end of the day it starts and ends (sometimes quickly) with how she looks! Sorry ladies but its true.  EVERY man wants his woman to look good, period!

I know women want to believe that men will look beyond the superficial aspects of looks to see the inner beauty of a woman and they will IF she looks good enough for them to want to stick around.  Hell , the truth is, the better you look the more a man will put up with before he kicks you out.  An unattractive woman will be on a  short leash.  I have never met a man that didn’t want his woman to be gorgeous.  I have also never met a man that says ” My girl is dog ugly but she is so smart. I just love her!”   Ask any man a simple question.  If you could have the everything you love about your current woman in the body of  Beyonce or Carmen Electra, would you take it?  Trust me the answer would be yes; no matter what he says to your face.

Now, I am not saying every man ends up with a beautiful woman.   Thats another issue (which we’ll be talking about on our show).  Also, beauty is in the eye of the beholder but ugly is pretty clear.  So, ladies don’t be fooled, all the manicures, pedicures,  gym workouts, tummy tucks, breast implants, face lifts , botox, wigs and weaves do matter.  If you look good men are paying attention!  DAYUM!!!!, the truth is pretty ugly!